Without You
by Asya Paris
Summary: Sometimes it takes almost losing someone to make you admit the feelings you have for them. Destiel one shot. Reviews welcomed!


Author's Note: First Supernatural fic so thanks for reading! Reviews are welcomed and highly encouraged but please go easy on it. Oh, and I don't own anything. 

He buried it deep down, under terms even he believed were true. Ally. Friend. Brother. That is what this was. That is what it would forever be. But sometimes, after a little too much to drink or after taking a more epic beating, before his head cleared, another term would boil up from that well. Lover. Oh, it hadn't happened yet. Would never happen. But after that one drink too many or when he was swimming up from unconsciousness, he would admit to himself that that is where he wanted this to go. 

The feelings were powerful, stronger than those for Cassie or even Lisa. Maybe this had always been his fate. Maybe this was why he had never been successful with long term relationships- because someone else had been coming. Someone he would bond with so strongly that all other relationships would seem so small in comparison. Yet he buried it. It made him uncomfortable. It was not what he thought he wanted. 

Until now. 

He stood stone cold sober in front of the abandoned warehouse, gun cocked and ready. Sammy was already heading around to take the back. Right now, he would give anything to tell Cas how he felt. Give anything for the angel to be alive. Give anything to blink his eyes and find them both back in that motel room. Not standing here, wondering if he would walk in there to find his friend dead. He wasn't sure he could take any more deaths. And not this one. Hadn't he lost enough already? 

He ran. Ran through the door. Shots were fired. Sam must be engaging them. He resisted the urge to yell Cas' name. It could bring them down on him. His goal was simple- rescue Cas. Sam was the bait; the distraction. He hadn't liked the plan but it had been Sam's idea. Sam, who had been unnaturally quiet ever since they had realized Cas had been taken. He had noticed the looks his brother gave him but he wasn't prepared to address them. Not now. 

He opened every door. Peaked into every room. Cas could be anywhere. Where was he? He nearly screamed. He had to find him. Had to save him. Had to tell him. The thoughts burned and drove him. 

He almost missed it. The side door, cleverly hidden next to a cabinet. He wrenched it open to reveal stairs. Down he ran. The room opened up before him. A ring of fire and in the middle, strung up from the pipes, a bloody body. They were there, standing, watching. Dean saw red. 

If Cas was dead… too many regrets. He had too many. He couldn't add this to the list. He just couldn't. He felt a presence at his side. Sam stood there, bloody knife in hand. Sam nodded once. No words needed to be spoken. The brothers knew what to do. 

He ran, yelling, into their midst. Salt. Holy water. An angel blade. Ruby's knife. There were many but the brothers had faced worse odds. In the end, it was quick. His wrath was an awful thing to face. It deepened as the still figure in the middle of the fire did not move, despite the noise, the screams. 

Please, Cas, he begged, don't be dead. 

It was over. Sam ran to a lever and wrenched it causing water to fall from the pipes. The ring of fire went out in a puff of smoke. He ran. Grabbed his friend. Reached up and cut the ropes binding his hands to the pipes. Gently lowered him to the ground and called his name. 

"Cas! Cas, wake up you son of a bitch. You cannot be dead. You hear me!" He held him, just calling his name. A movement. He blinked back the tears and all the thoughts of the deals he could make. He looked into crystal blue eyes. 

"Dean?" Alive. His relief was immense. He grabbed Cas' face and pressed his lips hard against the angel's. He felt Cas' small flinch of surprise and he nearly pulled back. But Cas deepened the kiss, as if both of them needed this moment and needed each other more than air, more than anything. He could taste the blood from Cas' wounds and the hint of salt from the tears that still leaked from his eyes. He didn't want it to end but reality was calling. He pulled back and looked into Cas' eyes. 

"Don't you ever do that again. You understand me? Never again." Cas nodded. He thought that was that and made to stand up, but Cas gripped him tighter. He looked at Cas, felt emotions wash over him. Cas moved, reached up, and laid his hand on his cheek. 

"I could not live without you either." It was all he needed to hear. He kissed Cas again, harder. The world faded away. It was right. It was time. They needed each other. Had always needed each other. Would always need each other. 

Sam stood there, watching his brother kiss the bloodied and battered angel as if Dean's life depended on it. A smile played along Sam's lips. It was about damn time.


End file.
